A Little Bit Of Sunshine

God, I spent my life waiting For a miraculous hand to free me Set me apart, declare me worthy I got emotional today, standing by the chilli pepper tree At my front gate...  Thinking of how something so small Of no renown could blossom so elegantly ... and I was jealous Even though my life is filled with pain, no glamorous possession to my name... Could I ever be as great As the chilli pepper tree by the gate? Could anything as breathtaking ever come  from me? 

I grew up on a diet of fairytales Devouring every bit of magic I could get my hands on When Cinderella, Aladdin and Snow White ran out of steam, all that was left Were kitchen magazines They were sitting in a stack, waiting for the next visitor to crack them open...  So I traded enchanted forests for Granite countertops and stainless steel sinks Whirlwind romances for state-of-the-art appliances  Lightwash cabinets and hardwood floors Became a new fantasy world to explore You cannot become what you cannot see...  My dream kitchen... windowed, green,  was a picture Of who I could be, the kind of life I would lead Would I be the mother who baked treats  every afternoon?  A clean freak?  Or would we sit on the counters sipping  Coffee in our morning shoes?  I never stopped believing in fairytales  I just started writing them myself... 

I bought a set of paint the other day You couldn't tell me, with my acrylic set That I wasn't Da Vinci undiscovered yet The stains on my bedspread were nothing but a testament to greatness Of course, I only have a single painting to my name,  Which I gave away on Christmas day It was the sunset by the seaside  Pink and red skies  And ocean waves crashing on the shore It was probably the best thing I made  But it was worth it for the look of awe  on her face. 

Just seven more washing machine minutes And I'm free to go about my day Run a few errands, see to hydrangeas growing on the driveway  and the chilli pepper tree by the gate Then I'll see if everybody ate, and set the table And wash the plates Just seven more and I'll have the rest of the day Except sweeping the dust that accumulates  Every hour on the hour It'll only make sense then, to take a shower  and pore over my wardrobe for suitable attire  Wrangle up a hair tie And the minutes are sure to fly Just seven more and I might feel genuine warmth if I'm lucky Seven minutes and I won't have to worry if anyone could love me Seven minutes and I'll be worthy...  Sometimes seven minutes and eternity  Are the same thing. 

*I love the first few movies of the Fast and Furious franchise. They are perfect comfort movies and really captured the era they were made in so well. *My favourite trope is… friendship.  Whether it’s the power of friendship, or the bond between a human being and an animal/creature. What I especially love is the 'unlikely' friendship: where two people who don't see eye to eye, begin to understand and appreciate the other's differences.  Gets. Me. Every. Time.  *I’ve never seen Star Wars . I know that it’s good, and I'll probably like it. The opportunity just never came up... I'm just saving it up for a special occasion. Like a gift to my future self. (also Lord of the Rings ) *For a long while I had a fixation with old Barbie movies, but I actually think they’re awkward and cringe.  *My favourite Spider-Man is The Amazing Spider-Man  * I’ve seen every single Cinderella adaptation. It's a classic story that never gets old, and I love seeing how it's inte...

  And pots fit into each other in neat little stacks Each one part of a matching set Doing what they were meant to do Who could conceive of that?  But we struggle to make space  for each other To be a unit, thinking for the other's best If we could be like pots... Empty and selfless  Existing only to serve others

I didn't prepare a speech or anything My life was planned so meticulously Until Brighton Beach ruined everything I signed my name on a form asking for volunteers I needed a change of scenery and found  myself here Helping people through their trauma  and fear And who is this that emerged from the shadows, perfectly at home Among the broken But myself, the shy and un-outspoken?  I always said I wanted to make a difference  in the world  And honestly, the view doesn't hurt

Artists and their funny ways All we do is spend our days In pajama pants thinking up ideas And plans that we never carry out But they're still nice to think about And we take stuffy jobs  just to cover the cost  Of meandering about, lost But at least we can write about it A new entry in our journal or our turn to read in the poetry circle At the café down the street We're grumpy old hats,  barely making eye contact  And we're thankful for that. 

It was the thought that I could do anything Be anyone That frightened me most of all Misery, I could weather Diappointment, I'd come to expect But greatness is a fear I ain't conquered yet

A hag and a half You school your scowl into a laugh Lips set at half-mast,  you lift your foot off of my chest Just enough to let in a breath  To keep my heart beating ever so slightly  And carve out a meager existence A little life...beneath the grime of your shoe

I've always lived in fear That the tiniest misstep or misjudgement would be the thing to ruin my little life. But now I ask, what life? Always on the precipice, waiting to fall Perhaps a little life is no life at all The fear of ruining my life stopped me from living one. 

If the statistics are to be believed, the 'blog' is becoming obsolete. Doomed to join the fate of the magazine, slowly gathering dust on a distant shelf.  It was with triumphant glee that the ' blog'  took its place. "The hottest news and fashion trends at the tips of your fingers. All the features of a magazine, on a single web page." Call it poetic, then, that blogs will soon meet a similar fate. People aren't typing URLs on their internet server anymore. They're googling the information they need and tapping the first option they see, never to return again. Forcing blogs to churn out search-friendly content and lose their original intention: Individuals logging their thoughts and experiences to attract regular readers. Still, blog platforms are still active and preferred amongst readers and writers.  But they're dramatically outpaced by bite-sized and short-form mediums of content: the Instagram explore page, Tiktok and YouTube shorts. It's ...